Two of
At 61 the days of her peroxide pout and outlandish outfits, like CBGB are a thing of the past. Instead Debbie came dressed as Our Miss Brooks complete with dyed red hair and managed to look almost as condemned as the club.
Looks like two bits of
More Rank & Bile
According to the British press, Michael Jackson was spotted this week in St Tropez in what appears to be some kind of Audrey Hepburn type drag.
The singer was seen in the company of a young girl, believed to be his daughter Paris, wearing a frilly blouse, tight women’s jeans and women’s shoes all topped off with a kind of breakfast at tiffany’s hat! Mmm fetching!
This isn’t the first time Jackson has been spotted in girlie garb earlier this year he was spotted in Bahrain wearing a Middle Eastern abay and veil usually reserved for women.
However the plot thickens, now that Jackson’s reps deny the singer is a guest of Prince Alwaleed - a nephew of Saudi Arabia’s King Fahd, in St Tropez. Adding he hasn’t been there in years.
If that’s true then all I can say is there is one hell of an ugly woman prowling the streets of St Tropez.
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Divas,
Frock Horrors
1 comments
The I Definately Would Hunk Of The Month
This month our Hunk of The Month is a bit of toff, totty for a change.
The 36 yr old, strapping 6ft 1inch blonde, first came to our attention in the laughably bad fim virtual sexuality, which only saving grace was Rupert appearing for much of the film sans clothes.
Since then he’s specialised in English fops, public school boys and period drama roles like Cambridge spies, The Student Prince, Casanova, Jane Eyre and the Four Feathers.
Like his Mother, To The Manor Born star, Angela Thorne, he seemed destined for a career of upper class twit typecasting in BBC period dramas, until he was cast in TV drama series Spooks (renamed MI5 in the US) which sees him as a sexy government secret agent. The series is proving to be a hit on both sides of the pond gaining Rupert quite a reputation as a heart throb.
More recently he also landed a good second lead in Woody Allen’s film, Match Point opposite (former hunk of the month) Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Scarlet Johansson which hopefully means we’re going to be seeing a whole lot more of Rupert on the big screen as well as on TV.More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Hunk Of The Month
4
comments
The Queen flew into Belfast this week with a severely bloodshot eye, giving a whole new meaning to catching the red eye. The game old bird carried on as usual with her engagements. Whilst Buckingham Palace the masters of understatement, refused to comment on why, only saying the Queen has a slightly red eye and is not in any discomfort.
You have to hand it to the old girl she's certainly a trouper!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Royals
3
comments
The Uk government has just decided to upgrade Crystal Meth (AKA Tina) from a class B to a class A drug. Good news for drug campaigners bad news for certain stick thin Hollywood starlets and their stylist!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Just Say No,
Nicole,
Weighty Issues
1 comments
Mel Gibson has told Diane Sawyer in a recently taped interview that "I've apologized so much, more than anyone I know, It's getting old," Gibson was talking about his anti Semitic rant after a drunk driving arrest last month and for previous claims that the holocaust didn’t happen, but it seems he hasn’t apologised nearly enough for Joan Rivers taste:
She told Celebrity Week, "He is an anti-Semitic son of a bitch. He should f**king die.
"I think everyone should not watch the interview with Diane Sawyer. The hypocrisy is what I hate. You know it's all about ratings and Diane Sawyer she's married to a Jewish guy--Mike Nichols…It's ridiculous because she'll get great ratings and (Gibson) will be back in business."
Not surprisingly, Rivers says that Gibson has now earned a place in her stand up act: “His bumper sticker is ‘My other car is a gas chamber.’ The other is ‘I heart Hitler,’” she joked before again turning serious. “I believed it when he said six and a half million Jews spent World War two in Boca and didn’t die. He is what he is. How refreshing that we all now know.”
Looks like Gibson’s apologies are not getting that old, after all, I suspect he’s going to be apologising for a long time to come. This could be the start of the end, for this fascist loser and about time too!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Car Crash Of The Month,
Rants
1 comments
Not content with telling one of her audience to shut the f**k up it seems the sewer mouthed diva is on a roll! Now it seems she's got it in for her whole audience . There's nothing like paying several hundred bucks to be lectured to and sworn at! Way to go Babs!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Barbra,
Divas,
Icons,
You Tube Favourites
2
comments
It seems the Hollywood size zero club has a new member, Nicole Kidman. So much for recent rumours that she's pregnant! In Rome to promote her new film "Fur" Nicole showed off her new scrawny figure topped off with a face so full of botox she's starting to look like she really is from Stepford!
The problem with dieting within an inch of your life is that whilst you can botox away the scrawny face effect, you end up with the hands/claws of an 80 yr old. Just look at Nicole Richie's hands...not pretty! Little tip Nicole... when you strive to have the face of a 12yr old girl, putting your withered old hand anywhere near your face kinda ruins the effect!
Either lay off the botox or get some gloves!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Bad Surgery,
Weighty Issues
2
comments
Seems Rank & Bile owes Farrah an apology after we gave her a You were never fuglier post and criticised her bad surgery, it seems the reason the former Charlie's Angels star has been looking tired and worn of late is that un-be known to her she has had cancer of the intestine and anus. Farrah got the news just after her triumphant comeback appearance at the Emmy's Arron Spelling tribute.
She now faces six weeks of gruelling radiation treatment.
Former lover Ryan O' Neal, who himself battled leukemia a few years ago is back at her side and helping her through it, as she was for him. ''She's so strong,'' he says. `I love her. I love her all over again. I was the first person she called when she was diagnosed. I love her, I've loved her for 25 years, and she knows that. Farrah is a fighter. The first thing she said to me was, 'I've got cancer.' The second thing she said was, 'I'm going to beat this.'
Good for you Farrah and the best of luck!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Bad Surgery,
You Were Never Fuglier
1 comments
Jennifer Aniston is a loser in love yet again. First Brad now Vince, seems she just can’t hang on to a man, when Brad Pitt came to his senses no one was surprised in fact the only question was, what the hell Hollywood’s sexiest man ever saw in dreary old Maniston, in the first place. Now it seems she can’t even hang on to a dead beat like Vince Vaughn. She must be one hell of a lousy lay!
Might have helped if Jen hadn’t spent the whole relationship moaning about how she still loved Brad. Get over it he’s moved on maybe you should try the same! Presumably the next poor sod will have to listen to months of her whining about how she still loves Vince. In fact every interview and article lately is her bemoaning her lot, declaring undying love for Brad and hatred for Angelina. She needs to realise bitter and needy is never appealing!
As Aniston seems permanently to reside in the land of denial she went on Oprah yesterday to say everything was fine with her and Vince, hmm her PR people obviously forgot to tell Vince’s what the official line was as The Sun got a pic of him in London, all over a mystery blonde, like a rash.
Do yourself a favour stop deluding yourself and stop whining and you never know you might actually be able to hang on to the next one!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Car Crash Of The Month
0
comments
In the Australian version of Harper's Bazaar, Posh says having three children and losing the baby weight has taken its toll and that she looks "really awful naked." She says:
"I've got so much saggy skin on my stomach. I might fit into jeans, but trust me, I look really awful naked." Beckham, 32, adds that she has "no bum at all," despite her appearance in ads for her new fragrance, which she credits to the magic of retouching. Still, all the scrutiny may have soured her a bit on the idea of fame. "Do I wish I could be anonymous?" she says. "Of course. I don't need to feed my ego that way anymore."
No? Well maybe you don’t need to feed your ego but if you occasionally fed your mouth your skin might not be hanging in folds like an empty sack round your waist and your ass might not have vanished into thin air! As for looking awful naked do you have a mirror? Obviously not, or you’d have noticed you look god awful clothed as well!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Posh
2
comments
Well it seems Babs doesn’t mince her words last night she gave fans an earful of Bush-bashing at
Streisand shot back with, "Why don't you shut the f- - - up. If you can't take a joke, why don't you leave and get your money back."
Obviously the guy couldn’t take a joke as he got up and left.
Mess with Miss Streisand at your peril!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Barbra,
Divas,
Icons
1 comments
What the hell is going on with the Madge baby adoption rumours? Despite denials from her rep Liz Rosenberg, the rumours keep coming.
Officials in
Someone needs to explain to the officials over there: It’s called milking it for maximum publicity and it’s what Madge does best!
The People not buying the denials from the Madge camp, ran an exclusive:
POP Queen Madonna is adopting an African baby boy called Luca
The People can reveal and the multi-millionaire mum of two could even bring the year-old orphan back to
Meanwhile poor little Lourdes must be spitting tacks as she watches her inheritance get sliced three ways instead of two!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Madge
3
comments
The train wreck that is Kate Moss and Pete Doherty’s romance, continues to lurch from one crisis to another.
Following rumours Pete is back on the drugs. Kate threw a dishevelled Pete in a ripped jacket and half naked, out of the house after a heated row at 3am, (see pic) only to go and retrieve him from a pal’s place in East London the following morning. The strain is showing on Kate as well as recent snaps of her show her trying to hide a face full of spots and looking pretty rough.
Better get some beauty sleep Kate or your career is gonna plummet as fast as his and who’s gonna pay the bills for The Priory then?
Having already cancelled his tour, rumours are that Pete is on his way back to re-hab again, having only been out a couple of weeks and as if that wasn’t enough Kate has been telling friends she’s determined to marry him and wants his child as soon as possible! Reportedly, Kate told a friend,
"I love him and know that, for all his faults, I will spend the rest of my life with him. I also want my little girl Lila to have a brother or a sister."
Lordy! that’s all the world needs, one more crack baby for social services to deal with.
More Rank & Bile
Seems George Michael isnt the only one who likes a little weed now and then. Parasite Hilton was photogrphed this week or more accurately the contents of her handbag where and either she's taken to collecting bits of old dried up moss or else she was planning a somewhat mellow evening.
That's going to look good when she's up before the judge next month for her drunk driving charge!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
George Michael,
Just Say No,
Paris
1 comments
Friday night we went off to Islington to see the Devil Wears Prada, given that Lauren Weisberger’s book was one of my favourite trash novels of recent years, I was really looking forward to the big screen version. Well! What a huge disappointment! Whilst Meryl Streep tried her best with a script as flimsy as Tom Cruise’s grasp on reality even she couldn’t save this yawn-a-thon. Whilst the book had a bit of bite and edge and served up Miranda Priestly as one of the most dastardly characters put on paper the saccharine film version made her more like Mary Poppins with shades.
It didn’t help that knowing the book was based on the real life character of Anna “nuclear” Wintour I’d had a picture of her in my head as I read it, only to see Meryl look as unlike Ms Wintour as possible, presumably this was to prevent any more ire from the formidable Ms Wintour and her lawyers.
Why is it
See The Trailer Below
Labels:
Movie Reviews
2
comments
Rumours are abounding about Madonna’s possible adoption of a child from
Her charity is not ending there either she is also funding a water supply project and yes you guessed it, the water supplied will be kabbalah Water! (As it retails at about £4 a bottle it might be cheaper just to ship them in Evian!) She’s also looking at educational projects, which means the poor little mites will probably be subjected to Madonna reading them her crazy kabbalah children’s books, as if they haven’t suffered enough already!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Madge
1 comments
Yves St Laurent announced his retirement from the fashion industry after 40 years in 2002.
He revealed that his decision was based on disgust with an industry that had become ruled more by commercial gain than art.
"I have nothing in common with this new world of fashion, which has been reduced to mere window-dressing," he said.
"Elegance and beauty have been banished."
In Paris this week poor old Yves St Laurent saw just how far "Elegance and beauty have been banished." when he saw Posh and Katie Holmes in the front row of his fashion show. In fact, he was obviously so appalled; he promptly collapsed outside and had to be rushed to hospital.
Some people, it seems, will do anything to avoid being photographed with Victoria Beckham!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Posh
2
comments
Brand Beckham may be desperate to make it onto the A list in LA but it seems the best the pair can do, is as hired help to the stars.Posh has been employed by Crazy Cruise to escort Katie as a combination bodyguard/ paid companion on a trip to
Meanwhile back in LA, whilst Posh cavorts with the crazy Cruises, her husband David has been mixing with Angelina and Brad Pitt. Is Brad Pitt, David’s new BFF? No not quite. David has been retained by Brad and Angelina to train young Maddox Jolie-Pitt to play soccer!
I’m sure when The Beckhams were dreaming of invites to the A List’s homes they were rather hoping to go in through the front door rather than the servants entrance!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Crazy Cruise,
Posh
2
comments
So last night it was off to the Apollo Victoria for Wicked the musical story of the witches of Oz.
This musical has taken Broadway by storm but has opened here to mixed reviews here and I can see why. The plot is a somewhat dumbed down version of the brilliant Gregory Maguire novel of the same name and as musicals go it’s a cut above the average.
The sets are fantastic as are the special effects and special mention should be made of the really clever lighting.
The problem is the score, there’s only one vaguely memorable song (Popular) which in a nearly 3 hour production is not a good hit rate and rather than moving the plot along most of the banal ditties stop it dead in its tracks.
All that aside, special praise should go to the cast, especially, Idina Menzel as Elphaba and Helen Dallimore as Glinda who despite the lack of a score still manage to pull off a mini triumph with chutzpah, dazzling voices and two bravura performances. The audience I sat with last night certainly thought so with a standing ovation that brought the house down and this time not on either of the witches’ heads!
What a shame the score didn’t live up to their talents. There is also good, solid, if somewhat camp, support from Adam Garcia, Miriam Margolyes (almost stealing the show in parts) and Nigel Planer, and between them and the sets, you almost forget the score is so weak…..almost.
Definitely a case of, I came out humming the scenery!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Theatre Reviews
2
comments
A recent not so blind item in The Daily Mail. Quoted model turned designer and boutique owner Paige Adams-Geller:
"I kept wondering why I would see an actress one week and she would look normal, and the next she would look gaunt, and I found out it is all down to crystal meth [A.K.A "Tina" which suppresses the appetite] the latest must-have accessory here in LA." She also told us the name of the 'celebrity stylist' who is now suddenly so in demand, simply because she also acts as the stars' drug dealer.
Given how rough…erm, slim, stylist Rachel Zoe looks (top pic) and given that her clients include Hollywood skeletons Nicole Richie, Mischa Barton and Kate Bosworth you have to wonder if maybe Miss Richie isn’t telling the truth and in fact doesn’t have an eating dis-order after all. It might also explain why Nicole was seen leaving a clinic that specialises in Crystal Meth addiction recently.
Time to ditch the stylist girls before you start looking, drop dead gorgeous, literally!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Just Say No,
Nicole,
Weighty Issues
3
comments
Whilst Princess Diana loved nothing better than a Royal Ball, on one occasion even dancing with John Travolta at one.
It seems her sons are fans of different kinds of balls all together. Prince William was caught, this week, waiting for the balls to drop at a Mecca Bingo Hall, close to his barracks in
After joining the club using fake name, William harry, He first tried to convince locals he was a look-a like but came clean after his chums gave him away, even graciously signing a few peasant’s bingo cards!....Mmm classy!
Meanwhile younger brother Harry looks like he’s been playing with yet another kind of balls, if this recent picture of the crown jewels is anything to go by! Harry certainly looks like he’s having a lot more fun with his balls than William!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Royals
1 comments
Despite being arrested at Colindale police station, where he was booked on suspicion of being unfit to drive and drug possession, before being released on bail until November.
Hmm keep telling yourself that
Someone get this boy some help or at the very least, a chauffeur
More Rank & Bile
Thank God Victoria Beckham is to finally stop flogging the dead horse that is her music career and has also nixed any idea of an acting career. Milions of music and movie fans will sleep more soundly tonight!
Beckham told Harper's Bazaar magazine:
I'm done with music and I'm never going to act,"
Unfortunately the world of fashion is still in for many more sleepless nights, as she also went on to say:
"Fashion is what I love. I've dreamed of doing my own clothing line from even before I was a Spice Girl. "Now I'm able to do what I love and I've found I'm really good at it."
Really good at fashion? How hard is to dial a stylist to come dress you? The question is will the Posh clothing line be available in anything above a size zero?
Judging by this picture of her new boob job, what she's really good at, is shoplifting canteloupes!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Bad Surgery,
Posh
0
comments
Mel Gibson who was forced to seek help for his alcoholism less than two months ago, after a drunk driving arrest and the disgraceful anti semitic tirade which followed, has been spotted drinking beer in Austin, Texas, according to the upcoming issue of the National Enquirer.
“I couldn’t believe my eyes. Mel Gibson was swigging a Bud with two adoring young women hanging on his every word,” the tab quotes a musician named Steven Smith as saying. Smith claims that the alleged incident occurred at Stubb's Bar-B-Q on Sept. 22 at around 1:15 a.m. According to Smith, about 75 people were at the bar, but Gibson and his group were in an area that was “cordoned off so no one could bother him.”
More likely he was cordoned off to protect passing jews and motorists! So much for his much publicised remorse and spell in re-hab!
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Car Crash Of The Month
1 comments
Seems Like Esther is not giving up on her 80's hooker wig just yet, well a girls gotta get her money's worth, in this case about $5 worth by the looks of it.
Here is Madge in a preview of her new video Jump, wig and all!
MoreRank & Bile
Labels:
Madge
1 comments
Suri Cruise has started a trend it seems Baby toupees!
"Outrage as US baby wig craze hits Britain" screamed The Daily Mail today and then went on to quote various experts on the health and safety implications of wigs for babies. Trust the Daily Mail to get their knickers in a twist!
Meanwhile at baby toupees.com the source of The Daily Mail's ire, the firm's website, says it aim to "show that while parenting can be a great responsibility, it can also be a source of endless amusement."
Founder Graham Farrar said: "Having a baby doesn't mean you have to stop having fun or do everything by the book. We don' take ourselves or our products too seriously."
Britney is probably bulk ordering as we speak!
Buy your Own at Babytoupees.com
More Rank & Bile
Labels:
Crazy Cruise
1 comments
Some people never learn it seems.
A police source said: "An officer saw
semi-conscious state. He was helped out of the car and an ambulance was called because there were real concerns for him."
He was cautioned and released on police bail yesterday afternoon. He is due to return on November 20 to find out if he is to face charges.
The 46-year-old pop superstar's long suffering partner, Kenny Goss, said: "He has nothing to say. He's fine and I've got him a McDonald's."
Hmm well maybe after you've finished satisfying his Mc Donalds munchies, maybe you ought to haul his sad ass into re-hab Kenny!
More Rank & Bile
