Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Behind The Scenes At The Tomkat Wedding Farce

More nasty details about the TomKat wedding farce are emerging from horrified honoured guests who attended the Scientology service. Apparently as Rank & Bile predicted there was a particularly ewww swapping of saliva at the end of the ceremony with TomKat snogging each other for a good 3 minutes before the embarrassed guests shouted at them to stop! This almost rivals David Gest’s equally stomach churning slobbering over Liza Minnelli at their fake celebrity ridden wedding. As well as having to witness TomKat swapping saliva many of the guest complained the $5m production cut corners on the food with many guests seen gobbling down dinner back at their hotel and J Lo sending out for 30 pizzas to feed her and her hungry friends after the event. (Hmm 30 pizzas that could explain the famous J Lo fat ass!)

It also appears the far from dispelling rumours about the groom, the wedding just served up a whole lotta comedy fodder for US talk shows, with Bill Maher comparing Katie Holmes to a "beard" and a "hostage" instead of a bride. Craig Ferguson stated that "none of Katie's former boyfriends are expected to attend the wedding and none of Tom's former boyfriends either!” and Conan O Brien waded in with "TomKat's wedding features 6000 scented candles and yet something doesn't smell right."

Last but not least, rumours abound about the surprise attendance of Brooke Shields at the wedding. Why would Brooke attend? When she famously fell out with Tom after he attacked her on network television, with a whole load of scientology mumbo jumbo, for using drugs to treat anti natal depression? Well, apparently she was paid by the Cruise Control team, to try and play down Tom’s lunacy and the resulting PR fiasco. Nice touch!

Well at least they weren’t lying when they said it was a Fairy-tale wedding.

More Rank & Bile


Anonymous said...

Did you know that L. Ron Hubbard (the creator of the Church of Scientology) put a plan in operation called "Project Celebrity"?

If you haven't seen it already, this is a pretty telling document that shows what Scientology is trying in order to get stars into the religion (in an attempt to persuade people like us, heh...)

A small blurb about it.


In Project Celebrity, Hubbard tells followers the following:

- "It is obvious what would happen to Scientology if prime communicators benefiting from it would mention it now and then,"

- "We will then allocate this person to you as your game"

- "Having been awarded one of these celebrities, it will be up to you to learn what you can about your quarry and then put yourself at every hand across his or her path, and not permitting discouragements or 'no's' or clerks or secretaries to intervene, in days or weeks or months, to get them into an auditing session"

- Hubbard says all costs for the hunt are to be borne by the hunter assigned the celebrity. But he will "Award the celebrity to you as your quarry" and give them exclusive hunting rights.

- "If you want one of these celebrities as your game, write us at once so the notable will be yours to hunt without interference."

- He also offers two weeks of "special coaching" in Phoenix, if you pay for the trip there and your own living expenses.

- Hubbard warns, "These celebrities are well guarded, well barricaded, over-worked, aloof quarry. But, if you are successful, if you bring one of them home you will get a small plaque as your reward."


Think that the wedding was a part of "Operation Celebrity"?

Myles said...

Now that is truly scary!