Saturday, January 27, 2007

Tom Cruise Hailed As The Christ Of Scientology!

Whilst his wife is in Paris, it seems Tom has taken a trip of his own, to crazy town!

The diminutive actor, who is a devout follower of the scientology cult, has been hailed by leaders of the faith as the "chosen one" who will spread the word of the religion.

High-ranking Scientologist David Miscavige is convinced in years to come Crazy Cruise, will be worshipped like Jesus all over the world as he becomes a prophet for the religion.

A source close to the actor is quoted by The Sun newspaper as
saying: "Tom has been told he is Scientology's Christ-like figure. Just like Christ, he has been criticized for his views. But future generations will realize he was right, just like Jesus."

Hmm does that mean we get to crucify the crazy loon?

More Rank & Bile


Anonymous said...

That last comment almost threw me off the chair!
Keep it up! (of left or right or wherever...)


Anonymous said...

I’m writing you to ask for your help. The story you ran today, based on a “report” by one of England’s worst tabloids “The Sun”, is 100% false. It is also harmful, libelous and foments incorrect notions about my religion Scientology so as to cause strife and intolerance. I need your help to set the record straight.

In actual fact, nobody within the Church of Scientology considers themselves to be “Christ-like” – this would be a very inappropriate and arrogant comment and I’m sure you can see how this is being used only to antagonize Christians everywhere.

We Scientologists appreciate Tom Cruise’s efforts as a spokesperson of many of our Church’s initiatives. But he’s just an actor, holds no rank within our Church, and is by NO MEANS a “prophet” – and I am certain he himself would be embarrassed at the thought.

I hope you can help me in setting the record straight. The “Sun” is lying. Please get in touch with the Church’s Media Relations department, at

Thank you.

Greg Churilov,
Scientology Parishioners League

PS: By the way, you might remember that, before he dared speak out against Big Pharma, Tom Cruise was a generally well-liked actor. If you think about it, standing on a couch is not *that* big a deal. The fact is that the drug companies have engaged in a whisper campaign of character assassination on this actor. And with good reason: since Cruise spoke out, sales of Ritalin are down 21% in USA, sales of Paxil are now banned in the UK by the UK FDA, and the U.S. FDA requires blackbox labels on all antidepressants. And Big Pharma is mad, their pockets have taken the hit.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to chime in again.
In case you're angry at Scientology due to rumors we're anti-gay, I just want to dispel that rumor as well.

I have several openly-gay Scientologist friends.

If you want to read where the Church of Scientology stands on this issue, please read the following PDF:

Thank you